Tomorrow
is my birthday. My 30th birthday. My husband and
friends are throwing a party and it’s gonna be a long weekend, so
I’m taking Saturday and Sunday off. I’ll be back on Monday with all
sorts of cheese for you to enjoy! As for today, well, it’s all
about thirty! Happy Birthday to me!!!
30 People born
on April 26th
I took
this list from Wikipedia… all the links take you to each person’s
wiki page.
1. Ride those
little electronic cars at the front of the store.
2. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten-minute intervals
throughout the day.
3. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap.
4. Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.
5. Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.
6. Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, 'I think
we've got a Code 3 in House wares,' and see what happens.
7. Play with the automatic doors.
8. While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud
enough for all to hear, 'Who BUYS this crap, anyway?'
9. Ride a display bicycle through the store; claim you're taking it
for a 'test drive.'
10. As the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, look
mesmerized and say, 'Wow.Magic!'
11. Put M&M's on layaway.
12. Move 'Caution: Wet Floor' signs to carpeted areas.
13. Test the fishing rods and see what you can 'catch' from the
other aisles.
14. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying,
'...I'm Batman. Come, Robin--to the Batcave!'
15. TP as much of the store as possible.
16. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.
17. Play with the calculators so that they all spell 'hello' upside
down.
18. When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between
them, yelling, 'Red Rover!'
19. Make up nonsense products and ask newly hired employees if there
are any in stock, i.e., 'Do you have any Shnerples here?'
20. Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full-scale
battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men.
21.While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask the
clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are. Act as spastic as
possible.
22. Hold indoor shopping cart races.
23. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from 'Mission:
Impossible.'
24. Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.
25. Say things like, 'Would you be so kind as to direct me to your
Twinkies?'
26. Set up a 'Valet Parking' sign in front of the store.
27. Two words: 'Marco Polo.'
28. In the auto department, practice your 'Madonna' look with
various funnels.
29. When someone steps away from his or her cart to look at
something, quickly make off with it without saying a word.
30. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the
fetal position and scream, 'No, no! It's those voices again!'
